I Can’t Stop Laughing at RNC Delegates Copying Trump’s Ear Bandage

This week with the session of the Republican National Convention, the former President made his first appearance since the attempted assassination on his life at the Saturday rally and he wore a severely distorted bandage over his ear which had been cut. Depending on who you asked it was either like, Jesus rising from the dead on the third day or that slightly overweight girl from high school who would always show up to school in a brand new boot on the first day back. Regardless, a lot can be said of this man but what can assuredly not be said of him is that he cannot stage a hell of an opener. 
 
Whereas the Twitter Audience took their little japes at the undoubtedly ludicrous pantomime of the whole shebang, Trump supporters and RNC delegates were motivated. On Tuesday during the second day of the convention, some were seen putting on pretend bandages or even paper squares on their ears in a show of support to the disgruntled pathetic billionaire that is now the official party nominee. As one reporter for the convention at the RNC said, women are being sold the hat as merch, emblematic of the campaign. See below: 
 
The explanations they give for where, why and with what rationale they put comedically large fake band-aids on their ears, are even funnier than the episodes shown. One specifically from Arizona who had white-colored piece of paper over his right ear said to CBS on Tuesday that ‘this look is set to go viral and soon be the newest fashion trend. ’ 
 
“Everybody in the world is going to be wearing these pretty soon,” the man, Joe Neglia, told Rock. The man remembered a story of coming to work one day when there was an explosion of love in the room, and the desire to do what he could to remain truthful: “And then I saw the bandage and I thought, I can do that So I wore it to honor Trump and to show solidarity with Trump,” Neglia said. It’s very touching, I am almost tempted to cry, but if only they were not salivating to eliminate my right to access a simple health service. 
 
Similar to him, another delegate from Arizona was also wearing a paper on her ear, which she affirmed was white, and she said that she wore such piece “because I support my president. ” Oh, yes! 
 
Frankly speaking, I am not a doctor. Who am I to judge that Trump does or does not in fact need that eyesore of a giant bandaid on his ear, for signifying health and safety, and not mere attention and sympathy votes? At the very least it is possible to suggest at least two conspiracy theories that may be actualy worth investigating. Ahem: 
 
Next, might I suggest that Trump looks to Regina George’s example and rip out the chest of his shirt to show a bright purple bra underneath.