“Dear Remy”: Hollywood Career Coach Gives Advice to Bollywood Hero and Frustrated Mentee

I am a practicing professional actor of Indian origin currently and I have this recurring conflict which only seems to be getting a worse-filmed sequel. Again and again, I find myself in such parts as the ‘the exotic, macho, charming womanizer,’ you know the hot blooded ruffian who turns people upside down. Naturally, I’m flattered. While people may not like being associated with villainous roles referred to as ‘nefarious characters’, who would not want to be Bollywood Bond or the Maharaja of Mischief? 
 
But here’s the twist: really, this notion changes as soon as I get to the set as a presenter. One day the writer or producer wakes up and says, ‘This character needs to wear those thick glasses or has to wear sweater vests now. ’ They begin to encourage me to loosen my skirts, look ‘sexy,’ or even ‘brainy,’ or, even, ‘adorable. ’ One minute I am a femme fatale; the next, I am dispensing investment advice with that accent. 
 
It has happened to me more than I can remember or probably desire to remember that is if I dare to. I managed to get into one series where I was to portray a suave physician from some medical drama like ER or Grey’s; by the time scenes were being shot, I was just an incompetent rural physician who couldn’t detect heartbeat. Though a case in point was another gig where I was to play a smooth-talking con man, they decided to script me as a nervous accounting nerd, who could hardly con himself out of an envelope. 
 
I think I’m beginning to be a nuisance with confidence issues here but I really don’t know why. What should I do: continue playing along and cash the checks or it’s time to contest and demand the role that I was hired for? Remy I am stuck, can you please help me out with this one. 
 
Yours and Truly, The Maharaja of Mixed Signals 
 
To Ay Swinger Maharaja of Mixedsignals 
 
First of all let me state that I found the transition from Bollywood Bond to comedic GP to be absolutely brilliant. You obviously have the range and some of the lines delivered can only be described as cheeky—I’m sure you could smile those glasses off anyone’s face! 
 
It’s mind boggling, isn’t it, that you are being booked for an action hero and suddenly you come to set only to be asked to resemble a tax collector? It feels like you are invited to a dinner where you are expected to dine while the host gets to enjoy serving you as they pleased, maybe a salad. Of course not the organised dish they extolled! 
 
Well let’s get into this a little. might these good intentioned producers and writers be wanting to place you in a box they feel is easier to manage? Maybe they think that you are cute or charming and it looks like too much and too dangerous — as if you are about to induce the collective case of the acting response in the viewers. Therefore, the glasses are put on, to make you appear less ‘rock and roll’ as it were and ‘normal’. 
 
But what to do? You could just keep going along — yeah — you are even mastering these curve balls into great little shows and the checks are still cashing. Okay, but if this pattern is beginning to annoy you — and it might be time to talk anyway, right? It’s not a rebellious showdown, but rather a sort of an enquiry. 
 
Imagine how it would feel to question the next writer or the next producer about his or her desire to bring this change. Is he/she interested in what he working for, and do they see your character as a part in their plan? Could you kindly remind them that this isn’t the energy they hired you for and that you are fully capable of delivering the heart-stealer that they wanted? It occurs to them that there are consequences which they never considered or may never have thought about until now, such as yourself. 
 
And as they ever wanted to return us to the reserved sweater vest-look, which is so Justin Bieber – well, the attitude doesn’t have to disappear. So You are the Maharaja of Mixed Signals if anybody can straddle this fence then it must be you. 
 
Keep charming,
 
Remy 
 
Actually What Am I, A Prop Master Or A Plagiarist 
 
Dear Remy, 

I should start by saying: As it can be noted, I am not proud of myself. 
 
I’m a prop master, which I took up mainly out of necessity, although I enjoy it to a certain measure. My father was in the business too as his father was, so I had no choice. 
 
I also have a warehouse in Atwater Village where I also take clients around for an exclusive viewing of the pieces. It comprises my other income (we are really dealing with a crisis in the aspect of costs, Remy). 
 
Some come often for a rather more diverse tourist flavor: I cherish somewhat over-the-top photo and video props that I have collected for years—I have everything from feather boas and leather-bound books to antique medical equipment (don’t hesitate to contact if you need a Victorian drip stand). 
 
Let’s get to the specifics a bit here and things will start to really heat up. By far the most attractive exhibit visitors come to witness is an original part from the set of a film series I starred in. I best not tell you the specifics lest I reveal my identity, but let’s just say: it is a form of transportation that goes through space. Well, if I remember well I have lost the original item while shooting in set. The one that I am holding right now is a duplicate I made myself. 
 
I reckoned no one would be the wiser and that it was tucked away safely in a box in a studio warehouse somewhere, but a recent visitor assured me he saw it in a studio recently. I joked off as it being what they got wrong; I know, I have not slept at all since then. How would they feel if they go check and end up finding that I have been selling tickets to see a forgery? 
 
Should I move forward of this and accept this or should I confess about this?. Or wait for time perhaps, with an aim of waiting for the best outcome? I’ve even thought of escaping to Panama to start life all over again, but once again, I hate humidity. 
 
Yours, Prop Tart 
 
Dear Prop Tart, 
 
First of all, let’s face it, all of us have engaged in a little job inflation now and then – there is nothing that Hollywood has not been built upon. But you’ve got a problem, and it’s not the climate in Panama (actually, humidity really isn’t very friendly at all). 
 
The question is: how long do you want to spend a sleepless night thinking of this? That shall make you feel guilty—and the possibility of its discovery, shall continue looming over you like a microphone that is always inframe but only half seen. It might seem scary right now but honesty probably is the right thing for you to do. 
 
You could probably turn this into something as witty as this. What if you spun it as a sort of trivia about props that your guests asides have knowledge in? The die-hard fans would figure it out and if the others do not, that ‘glitter is the thing’. Identifying which of the fake is the actual item may actually add to its appeal of the “guess which one’s real”. As you can imagine, inspecting a prop tour is not quite like finding one of Willy Wonka’s golden tickets. 
 
And at the center of it, the concept of integrity can be considered to be at the heart of the matter. Do you think that you could sleep better at night knowing you have told the truth? Maybe you don’t need to make a grand confession, but you could subtly shift the narrative: “This is a replica of the initial setting one might have thought of” You might try to. Part truths, part real life but with a pinch of drama.

Do not get angry at the wrong times. And if you do— you most likely have at least ten decorative fans that you can use when designing your space. You’ve got this. 
 
Remy 
 
Help! They seem to be impulsive and irrational believes you might be thinking, My Old Mentor Is Driving Me Mad! 
 
Dear Remy, 
 
Let me share you about my client, though his name is not Steve but let me call him so for the purpose of this discussion. 
 
I’ve known Steve now for 30 years – he was a guest lecturer at UCLA on the Directing course, when I was still a student there. Back then I admired him with great extent; He had a set of awards for feature films he directed, popular and, for the reason I could not tell, he had a cigar cutter on his key chain. 
 
Thirty seconds later, or technically, thirty years later, I am undeniably successful or at least this version of me is. Well, I won’t like to boast on this letter, but I must admit that I have been having a golden carrier, infact the Hollywood reporter has written a story about me more than twice. 
 
Steve, on the other hand, seems to have peaked in the ’90s: or hope to make the sort of schmaltzy romantic comedies that no longer are acceptable in today’s settings. The issue is: Remind you, this realization has not yet occurred to him that I do not require his advice anymore. I’ve surpassed him. 
 
He still calls my home phone for the supposed purpose of giving his “Words of Wisdom,” sends me voluminous treatises on where he thinks a franchise I have been developing will be taking, and addresses me as his “ward” at industry functions, all the while attempting to prove that he is hip with the Kids by rapping “slay” and “brat summer. ” 
 
Remy — I believe that I have to sever the tie with my mentor. How do I tell him No? 
 
Mentee No More 
 
Dear Mentee No More, 
 
Before I begin, I would like to commend you on the success you have had you seem to have put a lot of effort in getting that golden career. But Steve! Steve, bless his soul, it appears that he has not moved an inch into the twenty-first century and is still in the late nineties. As much as he is old-fashioned in every term conceivable, it appears that he means well for you (I guess your Steve could use a “Brat Summer” to loosen up a little). 
 
Well, how does one go about the job of cooking his goose so that at least the loss of the meal will not be felt? Instead of offering your mentor what David called ‘The Big Dump Off’ – a rather rude way of describing someone who has supported you for 30 years could you not transition the relationship? Could it gradually turn into something which is not the “Words of Wisdom” and more of a once in awhile alibi to reminisce? For instance, you can say to him ‘Steve, I have benefited a lot from your guidance in recent years but I feel different now, I have new goals that need new approaches’. This way, you will not make him feel useless. 
 
Burning bridges should always be a last resort—because, let’s be honest: So who knows when Steve’s skills as a contributor might come in handy again anyway? Could it be that 2025 will also wake up the interest of the viewers in plots of cheerleader-girl-falling-for-geek-boy stories, long lost identical twins or glow-up stories with the boy next door football captain? 
 
And hey, who knows? Perhaps there are not a few truths within those lyrics, despite their obscurity rendered by the popular culture of the time. 
 
Well maybe you do need the proverbial “foot in the door” – the landline – but good riddance to the “protégée” and Steve’s god-awful joke about the cigar cutter. 
 
Remy 
 
Remy Blumenfeld is a well-seasoned TV producer and a personal performance coaching expert of Vitality Guru that focuses on business and career coaching for the elite media personnels. Send queries to: guru@vitality. guru. 
 
Questions modified by Sarah Mills.